Me & My Bright Idears

A 40-something living

in a 20-something world…

As a former event-planner (and now empty-nester), the offer of a part-time position with my church’s youth ministry staff sounded like a perfect fit. Little did I know that I would now be expected to go white-water rafting, star in a rap video and pray aloud with (GASP!) teenagers.

 

After I made it clear that I was definitely a “behind-the-scenes” member of the youth staff, my duties evolved into more communications and event-planning areas. In the beginning, I thought it was my job to rein in all the ludicrous and impractical ideas these 20-somethings wanted to produce for their 200 member youth group. “We don’t have time to pull that off…”, “There’s not enough money in the budget for that…”, “Pastor Jeff would NEVER let you have a flash mob in church!”

 

But actually, they thought it was their job to rid me of my antiquated and middle-aged mind-set. And they did.

As the only parent of an actual teenager on our youth staff, I thought my opinion on all things adolescent would carry a little more weight. And it did in some instances, but these "kids" taught me far more than I could ever teach them.

They taught me that youth  ministry cannot be planned out to the exact detail (something I use to take pride in doing in all areas of my life). Chairs don't have to be placed in even rows for worship - our teens will gather haphazardly in front of the band anyway, pushing the seating aside. The banquet doesn't have to include a well-balanced menu - they will only eat the chicken fingers and dessert anyway. And NOTHING needs to start on time - not only will the students probably be late, so will the staff!

They taught me that "with God, all things are possible." I am still amazed at some of the crazy ideas that we successfully pull off each year. Great Wolf Lodge, corn maze, bonfire, and Elevation Church - all in 24 hours. SIX 5th  Quarter after-parties in one season, serving 400-600 students at each event. An actual dancing and singing flash mob during the TRADITIONAL service on a Sunday morning (the congregation loved it, by the way!). No idea is too outrageous, no budget is set in stone, and no time frame holds us hostage. I've learned a lot from their faith in God to make things happen.

They taught me to be a better parent. Yes, I have now raised two Godly girls and I'm very proud of the way they turned out. But my 20-something cohorts have, in a way, parented hundreds more students than I have. Their experience with troubled teens, middle school drama and broken homes far outweighs my 18 years (x2) of experience in being a Mom. Instead of first trying to handle things my way (and when that doesn't work, God's way), I immediately go to Him in prayer, asking for guidance FIRST. Just like our youth staff does.

And lastly, they taught me how to be COOL. Nothing like working daily in a 10' x 10' office with 4 young people to have a good read on what's popular, what's lame and what has "swag" with our youth today. They've tried to convert me from a PC to an Apple, made fun of my "Mom" socks and have me wearing Keens now. They've coaxed me across a zip line and a slack line, taught me how to play Angry Birds and included me in their crazy Oscar Night videos. I'm still a little nervous around the students, but hopefully they accept me as more than just that lady that sends an occasional newsletter to their parents and takes up their money for camp.

This is not the youth group of my generation, nor of my kid's generation. This youth  ministry is looking to the future and moving towards ways THIS generation will make a difference when they go out into the world. They are not thinking "out-of-the-box," they are BUILDING the box! Even though they are only in their 20s, the decisions they make and the character they have hints at someone much older and wiser. Yet they still understand the pressures and complications of being a teenager. Their knowledge, caring and ability to counsel doesn't all come from a college education or even past experience. It comes from Him. 

Yes, they've taught me a lot, but I hope they've listened to some advice from this 40-something too: Hold fast to your Sabbath (which in our business is never on Sunday!). Spend as much time with your family as you do your youth group. Delegate - give me your little rocks so you can take care of the big ones.    Check your voice mail daily. Every family retreat does not have to be 10 families crammed into one "cabin" with 3 bathrooms. Only drink Starbucks coffee. Add 10% onto every retreat budget, because it always costs more than we planned. Oh! and don't forget to reward your administrative assistant with a spa gift certificate every so often.